My Lover's Horrible Past
by Arabiana
Summary: Usagi must find out what happened to Mamoru when he was little. Lots of angst, or so I think. But there is a happy ending, so don't think something horrible happens. r/r Thanks!


AN: Arabiana here. Hope ya'll've had a good plantin' season. No I'm not a hick, my sister dared me to say that. So, here is a little fic I thought up while talking to one of my good friends on the net. As you can tell by my previous fics, they are mostly inspired by two of my best friends. They're just so cute together, you wouldn't believe! Anyway, love-it, hate-it, it's up to you, but no matter what you think, please Read/Review!!! 

All standard disclaimers apply.   
  


Title: My Lover's Horrible Past 

Author: Arabiana 

Rating: PG or PG13 maybe even R for violent flash-backs (read on, you'll understand) 

Time Period: After Stars, they're engaged but haven't set a date 

Mood: Angst, lots of angst; kinda dark; but there is a happy ending!   
  
  
  


*****Usagi's POV***** 

I had always wondered what happened to Mamoru in the orphanage. But, I always sensed that he wouldn't, no, couldn't talk about it. I stayed away from the subject for a long time. Whenever someone mentioned an orphanage, he would seem to zone out, and his gorgeous midnight blue eyes would darken and swirl with turmoil. I didn't want to reopen old wounds. But still, we are engaged. I want there to be no secrets, no walls, no pain between us when we make our vows. It would be hard and painful for both of us, I knew. But there was no other way. I would confront him on Saturday at his apartment. I was supposed to go there anyway, but not as early as I am planning now. It is Thursday night now, just one more day.   
  


@@@Saturday Morning@@@   
  


The sun has barely peeked over the horizon. It's soft dawning light illuminates the form of a petite blond walking down the sidewalk. She looks as if she is walking towards the guillotine. The fate of her life hangs in the balance.   
  


*****Usagi's POV***** 

I couldn't sleep last night. So instead of trying, I just laid there, thinking. What could have happened there that would provoke such a reaction? When it was dawn, I got up, got dressed, and ate a small breakfast. It was small because my stomach was pretty much filled up by the tight knot of dread that had taken up residence there. I wrote Mom a note saying where I was going. I had to use our secret code though. Dad still hasn't come around about Mamoru, but Mom was VERY happy about it.   
  


I was well on my way to Mamoru's when the sum finally rose. It didn't seem to light my mood like usual though. I just couldn't get this sense of foreboding out of my heart.   
  


@@@Mamoru's Apartment@@@   
  


*****Narrator's POV***** 

Usagi rang the doorbell of Mamoru's apartment. 'I hope I don't wake him,' she thought. 

Mamoru stumbled through the house grunting every time he ran into something. He cautiously looked through the spy window. When he saw who it was, he jerked open the door, pulled Usagi in and locked the door behind them. He then wrapped her in his arms. 

"Usako! What's wrong? Are you hurt?" The questions poured out with the deepest concern possible.   
  


Usagi was quite bewildered by now. "Mamo-chan, I'm fine, everything's fine. I just wanted to come talk to you."   
  


Mamoru let out a breath and led her to the couch. It was then that Usagi realized that all Mamoru had on were his boxers. (AN: drool) "Mamo-chan I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you up," she whispered softly.   
  


"I'm fine Usako. I couldn't sleep anyway," he told her. Sincerity shining in his eyes. "Besides, I would give up a weeks worth of sleep to be with you for one day." 

Usagi put her arms around his neck, stood on tiptoe, and, with lips brushing his ear whispered in a sultry voice,   
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


Part 2 

"Mamo-chan, quit being poetic and get some clothes on before the temptation to tickle you over whelms me completely." Mamoru quite sensibly high tailed it to the bedroom and put on his sweats. He came back out blushing lightly. Usagi laughed softly and motioned him to sit on the couch by her. When they were both settled she turned to him and said, "Mamo-chan, I want to talk."   
  


"What about Usako?"   
  


"About something that will probably be hard for you to talk about. But it means a lot to me that you do."   
  


"I'll tell you anything Usako."   
  


She took his hand in both of hers and squeezed it comfortingly. The look in her eyes said everything.   
  


"I want you to tell me about your past. About what happened in the orphanage."   
  


She felt Mamoru immediately tense up. A look at his eyes confirmed that they were again filled with turmoil and fear. Usagi climbed onto his lap and hugged his head to hers. His arms came up and around her as if by habit alone.   
  
  
  


"Its alright baby. I'm here, I'm here," she whispered softly.   
  
  
  


&&&Echos of the Past&&&

A woman's scream of 'You miserable brat!' her hand coming down on a young Mamoru's terror filled face. 

A group of boys, young and old, hitting, kicking, beating a young Mamoru. 

The feel of a belt lashing his back and legs. 

Noiseless crying fits at night. 

Horrible nightmares that still plague him even as an adult 

The sight of bruises and black eyes in the bathroom mirror. 

The knowledge that if you told someone they wouldn't believe you. 

The wisdom to take it all and not fight back. 

The sight of other children being adopted and taken away from the horrible beatings. 

Knowing that you would never be one of the lucky ones. 

The sight of the orphanage in the rearview mirror on his 18th birthday.   
  
  
  


@@@Back in Mamoru's Apartment One Hour Later@@@   
  


"I wish so badly that I could have been there for you Mamo-chan," sobbed Usagi after hearing the horrible tale of child abuse.   
  


"You're here now," he murmured in her ear.   
  


Usagi looked up at him and lightly kissed his lips. "I wish I could stay with you at night to comfort you when you have the nightmares."   
  


Mamoru grinned devilishly,"Usako, if you were in my bed at night, my past would be the **last **thing on my mind." Usagi blushed crimson at that and hid her face in his shirt. He laughed softly and wrapped his arms tightly around her, rocking side to side. 'I feel so much...lighter, now that I've told Usako about what happened in my past. I don't know why I didn't tell her before. Maybe I was afraid she would think of me differently. How could I even think that my Usako would do that. She is too loving and caring to do anything like that. My Usako, how I love you.' I look up at the mahogany clock hanging on the wall.   
  


"Usako, it's only 6 o'clock, do you want to try and get some more sleep." She looked up into his tired eyes, noting the love in them, and nodded. He gathered her in his arms and stood up, taking her with him into the bedroom. He lowered her gently onto the right side of the bed. He then walked around to the other side and sat down on the bed. He pulled off his sweat shirt and threw it on the chair in the corner. Crawling under the covers and pulling his true love into his arms, Mamoru sighed in content and drifted off to sleep, never to be plagued by the nightmares again. 


End file.
